You Know You're TOTALLY HORSE MAD When:

• Your horse eats better than you do.
• You sign everything in yours and your horse's name.
• Your horse gets new shoes before you do.
• There's a saddle on the table, a bridle in the bathroom and a rug on the clothesline.
• You can be too sick to go to school but you're never too sick to go riding.
• You can rattle off every detail of your horse's bloodline but can't remember your sister's birthday.
• Horse poo smells good to you.
• Your worst enemy is the bot fly.
• You spend more time on your horse's hair than on your own.
• You tell your bike to "whoa". Or you cluck to make it go faster.
• You practise tail braiding on your mum's hair, friends' hair ... anyone's hair!
• Your pockets are full of hay.
• The green grocer is your best friend (after your horse, of course!).
• The only person in the world who understands you is your horse (and yes, I said "person" on purpose!).
• You can't for the life of you remember the word "heel". That thing on the bottom of your leg that joins it to your foot is called a "hock".
• People know where you live because there's a horse float parked in the front yard.
• You ask Santa for things for your horse.
• You have more pictures of your horse in your wallet than of any member of your family.
• You clean your tack after every ride but never clean your room.
• Your school uniform has horse hair on it even thought you've never worn it riding (well, not very often).
• You get thrown off your horse and are more worried about the horse than about you.
• There isn't a single photo of you without a horse in it.
• You get out of bed at 4 am to get ready for a show but can't wake up in time for school.
• You love meeting new people so you can tell someone else all about your horse.
• You don't understand why you get into trouble for soaking bits in the kitchen sink and washing saddle blankets in the bath.
• You can name 150 horse and pony breeds in alphabetical order but you can't remember the words to the national anthem.
• You could have had the worst day ever but none of it matters once you're in the saddle.

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